How to Prevent Self-Limiting Beliefs from Limiting your Life After Divorce
How often do you find yourself wishing that you could move far, far away and start a new life after divorce … a life
you’ve been dreaming of? But then that nasty inner voice interrupts you and says things like:
- You’re too old to find a new life partner.
- It’s too hard to move to a new city.
- You shouldn’t file for divorce until the kids are done with school.
- It’s not possible to start a business without finishing your degree.
Are those type of statements really true? Or are they self-imposed limitations? We all have an inner critic that makes us play small. Be aware of whether our thoughts are actually limiting beliefs.
What are limiting beliefs? They are general beliefs you have about people, situations, or life that hold you back from pursuing what you really want. If you believe something isn’t possible, you’re not likely to try.
Limiting beliefs are stored in your subconscious mind, so you might not even be aware of them. They are typically learned from what you’ve been told by other people, the media, and books. Your beliefs act as a filter, like sunglasses in front of your eyes, so that you see some things around you but not other things, all in accordance with your beliefs. Beliefs tend to be self-confirming and self-reinforcing. So when you hear about divorced women having trouble attracting a new mate, you say to yourself “See? I told you I was too old to find another life partner!”
So how can you overcome your self-limiting beliefs? The first step is to be aware of what the inner voice is saying to you, and how you are reacting to it. Then do some self-coaching by asking yourself:
- How true is that belief, really? Look for proof or lack of proof.
- Where did I get that belief?
- How has this belief affected me? Is this belief serving me? Or is it holding me back?
- What new belief can I replace it with, a belief that would be more empowering to me?
Most of our limitations are self-imposed. Deep rooted mental blocks and fears might require some professional help, but doing some self-coaching can free you from many of our self-limiting beliefs. Then you can truly focus on creating a life after divorce that is even better than the life you had before. Yes, there really is life after divorce!